Epilogue - as the years passed
A very serious failing transpired after the war when many, many ex-servicemen did not keep in touch with their comrades, and it is something I sincerely regret.
It appeared to fall apart shortly after I got married as many of the correspondence addresses I had were left at my parent’s home when I moved on. I had a diary with about 30 or 40 contacts in it, which sadly went adrift. For a short while I wrote to Ernie Carpenter in London (off the ML303) and to Jimmy James in Birmingham (Yeoman of Signals on the Vetch) – I was actually Jimmy’s best man at his wedding in 1948.
I also wrote to a Jock, A. Nicols, from Dundee. There were others but all went by the board eventually. One of my reasons apart from the one above may have been the studying and teaching aspect from 1946 to 1955, which was a very busy and hectic time, but is also a poor excuse.
There seems to have been about 25 to 30 year gap after the war when it was obliterated from my mind and then it became the vogue to recall those days. The reunions and recollections began to take shape but a big loss had already occurred during the intervening period. The gap was probably caused by commitments to the family and the shortage of cash as money was in short supply with many of us buying our first homes and having children, rather than arranging and attending reunions.
It would have been nice to grow old gracefully with those lads, although the reunions formed in the 1980s have helped. One’s memories have obviously dulled to a great extent and one does not recognise the fresh-faced fellow you saw across the mess deck table 60-odd years ago. I also have a little envy at seeing the genuine, rekindled friendships that have been rebuilt by the reunions. Of the hundreds of fellow sailors I have met at various reunions, I still yearn to meet one lad I was close too in those far off days. We were very close and open during the war whereas now the conversation tends to be more guarded and out to impress, except for the genuine types.
One wonderful outcome though has been the flourishing of a family relationship with a French family in Normandy – Jackie and Claude Boudais. Since revisiting D-Day in 1994 we have visited with them a number of times since and received the very best hospitality. I sincerely hope this relationship between the families continues after I depart.
A.R. – end of message…
It appeared to fall apart shortly after I got married as many of the correspondence addresses I had were left at my parent’s home when I moved on. I had a diary with about 30 or 40 contacts in it, which sadly went adrift. For a short while I wrote to Ernie Carpenter in London (off the ML303) and to Jimmy James in Birmingham (Yeoman of Signals on the Vetch) – I was actually Jimmy’s best man at his wedding in 1948.
I also wrote to a Jock, A. Nicols, from Dundee. There were others but all went by the board eventually. One of my reasons apart from the one above may have been the studying and teaching aspect from 1946 to 1955, which was a very busy and hectic time, but is also a poor excuse.
There seems to have been about 25 to 30 year gap after the war when it was obliterated from my mind and then it became the vogue to recall those days. The reunions and recollections began to take shape but a big loss had already occurred during the intervening period. The gap was probably caused by commitments to the family and the shortage of cash as money was in short supply with many of us buying our first homes and having children, rather than arranging and attending reunions.
It would have been nice to grow old gracefully with those lads, although the reunions formed in the 1980s have helped. One’s memories have obviously dulled to a great extent and one does not recognise the fresh-faced fellow you saw across the mess deck table 60-odd years ago. I also have a little envy at seeing the genuine, rekindled friendships that have been rebuilt by the reunions. Of the hundreds of fellow sailors I have met at various reunions, I still yearn to meet one lad I was close too in those far off days. We were very close and open during the war whereas now the conversation tends to be more guarded and out to impress, except for the genuine types.
One wonderful outcome though has been the flourishing of a family relationship with a French family in Normandy – Jackie and Claude Boudais. Since revisiting D-Day in 1994 we have visited with them a number of times since and received the very best hospitality. I sincerely hope this relationship between the families continues after I depart.
A.R. – end of message…
Alan married Grace Scott in 1956 and had four children - David, Verna, Mark and Craig. His career took him from Newcastle to Trinidad and eventually to 20 years service as the Building Manager for British Nylon Spinners, then ICI Fibres, in Pontypool, Wales. Alan lived for many years in the village of New Inn until his death on 19 December 2016, aged 91.